I used to believe that if an animal lost their ability to toilet independently, they would lose their dignity - and therefore no longer have a good quality of life.
I’m not sure where that belief came from, but I held it without even realising it.
Then Ziggi came into my life and threw that belief right out the window.
When Ziggi became incontinent due to an injury, the advice I received back then reflected the very belief I was carrying. If it hadn’t been for animal communication - and for Ziggi’s clear message that he wanted to live - I would have followed that belief without question.
And that’s the part that still feels sobering. I didn’t even know I had that belief.
So many of our beliefs sit quietly in the background, shaping our choices and reactions without us realising.
When Ziggi told me he wanted to live, it made me stop in my tracks. I had to question my own assumptions - and, at times, go against those who held the same belief I once did.
Over the years, Ziggi has needed help with toileting. And recently, as the nerve damage has progressed, that assistance has increased.
I often ask him how he feels about it - whether he sees this as a loss of dignity.
Ziggi’s answer surprised me.
He shared that not being able to toilet independently isn’t, in itself, a loss of dignity.
Receiving assistance isn’t a loss of dignity either.
What matters, he said, is how the help is given - and what thoughts we hold when offering it.
If the help is given with joy, respect, and admiration, then, in his words:
“What’s the difference between that and waiting for you to serve me my food since I cannot fend for myself?”
But if help is given mechanically, in a rush, with frustration or pity - that’s when it affects his emotional well-being.
And as Ziggi gently reminds me,
“Quality of life is determined by our emotions, not our physical function or ability.”
Until I was faced with this situation, I had no idea how much could actually be done to support him. From learning how to express his bladder to maintaining his bladder health generally - there was so much more possible than I realised.
Conventional veterinary medicine had its limits, and that led me to explore holistic treatments and healing. I found ways to support him through at-home Photizo light therapy, gentle massage, homeopathy, and acupuncture. These weren’t just physical treatments - they became acts of care that nurtured his emotional and spiritual balance as well.
Because when we start to understand that the physical, emotional, and spiritual must work together, we begin to see that judging an animal’s quality of life solely by their physical condition bypasses the deeper truth of who they are.
Ziggi taught me that helping him empty his bladder isn’t just a task - it’s a ritual. A time for connection, pampering, and cuddles.
In his words,
“Don’t make it only about my bladder. Make it about us.”
And that’s what we’ve done.
His bladder issues have become part of our bond - a daily reminder that the moments we share because of his condition are what truly give him quality of life.
💭 Have you ever found that your animal’s physical challenges brought you even closer together? I’d love to hear what that’s been like for you.
Free Resource: “Pawprints on the Heart” eBook
If this story touched you, you might enjoy reading Ziggi’s full story - it’s featured in Dr Jeff Grognet’s beautiful ebook:
📘 Pawprints on the Heart: Heartfelt Lessons from Pet Professionals on Loss, Grieving, and Beyond
This free ebook brings together real-life experiences from animal communicators, holistic vets, and healers - each sharing how animals guide us through love, loss, and healing.
🩵 You can find Ziggi’s story as the 11th story in the collection.
👉 Download your free copy here
This is so so beautiful, Joanne. You hit the heart of what I experienced caring for three special needs dachshunds over the years and their requirement of bladder expressing also. Though initially scared I'd not do it 'right', or that I'd hurt them physically in some way, I would find great joy in being of service to help each of them live their best lives. Two of them in wheelchairs for dogs, I remember sharing with people how they didn't care if they had wheels, they were just happy to live quality lives. And sharing how I helped my first dog go to the bathroom - holding her over the toilet - sharing a photo of this with thousands of school kids over the years when I did presentations, was so very fun. Kids really got a kick out of that and thought it was so cool I could help my dog in that way.
I think we humans struggle much more with the dignity issue than our animal friends. What a beautiful teaching they are for us in this way (and many more).
P.S. We had quite the funny moments too when poop would just happen at the most inopportune moments! Or like the time I found a little poop treasure in my purse! Holding my dachshund rather like a football in the crook of my arm, I didn't realize her butt was positioned quite accurately over the opening of my purse - and well you can guess how that happened -oh my goodness, I laughed so hard!